Thursday, November 11, 2010

How To Stop A Divorce


How To Stop A Divorce

A break up is a tough thing to go through when you are dating. But when you are married, a break up is much more than just a break's a divorce. When this happens it's quite common for one of the spouses to want to know how to stop a divorce. With that in mind, here some things to help you do that.

Before you actually try to stop your divorce, you need to ask yourself if it's really the right thing to do. Perhaps you still love your spouse and you would like to make things work. There's nothing wrong with feeling that way. However, it's in your best interest to take plenty of time to think things through. Why do you really want to stop the divorce? Is it because you are in love, or is it because you feel more secure being married? The main thing is to be honest with yourself, regardless of where that honesty leads.

From here on we will assume that you have the right motivations for wanting to stop your divorce. If you have only been threatened with divorce, try to find out how serious the threat is. That's not to downplay it as an idle threat. Any time the D-word is brought up, it should be taken seriously. At the same time, sometimes people get frustrated in the heat of an argument and say they want a divorce. But deep down, what they really men is that they don't know what else to say and they just want to be away from you until you both calm down.

So, take some time to find out what's really going on. If your spouse still says they want a divorce even when you are not mad at each other, then you need to start taking action right away. Whatever you do, don't get mad. Treat it in as calm of a manner as possible and find out what is at the root of them wanting to be separated.

Once you know why they want a divorce, you will be in a better position to stop a divorce from happening. However, you also need to ask yourself what changes will have to be made to make things work, and if you will be willing and able to make those changes.

Now, what if your spouse has already seen a lawyer to start divorce proceedings against you? This will make things that much harder, but it's still possible to stop a divorce even after the papers have been filed. You will need to be at the top of your game and ready to do some serious work. However, if you really want to be with your spouse and restore your marriage, then doing whatever it takes is what you'll have to do.

These things are never easy, but don't lose hope. Total honesty, being open and making the needed changes will give you the best chance to stop a divorce.
Learn More Click Here!

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Dealing With Relationship Break Up


Dealing With Relationship Break Up - Regroup And Sort It Out

Yuck, one of the worst things to have to go through is the loss of a relationship. It may not seem like you'll ever feel like you again. In most cases it will take time to get back to the 'normal' life you had before. The longer and more intense the relationship the longer it usually takes dealing with relationship break up.

There are no hard and fast rules about how long it should take to move on after a breakup. Everyone is different. Sometimes friends and family may mean well when they tell you to 'get back out there' but in reality, they may be depriving you of the opportunity to get your head around everything that has happened.

This time to regroup and sort everything out is very important, if it's done right. It's not about wallowing in 'what if's' or stalking your ex, or spending weeks on the couch convinced that your life is over. If you spend this time analyzing the relationship, good and bad, try to figure out honestly where you went wrong, you'll stand a much better chance of being able to move on with minimal baggage.

Now, no one is saying that you'll be able to look at things logically and clearly in a few weeks. In most cases it will take a month, or months, to get enough distance to be able to start deconstructing where the relationship went wrong, and that is one of the reasons you don't need to rush the 'moving on' stage.

On the other hand, you should be making at least small, consistent strides forward after a month or so. If not, you may need some extra help. If you're just not moving on, even in baby steps, you should seek help. The same thing holds true if you find yourself engaging in self destructive behavior such as having sex with anyone you can find or drinking too much.

Don't think of this as being a sign of weakness, as a matter of fact, nothing could be further from the truth. It takes enormous amounts of strength and courage to admit you have a problem and ask for help.

If you are doing o.k. on your own than one of the things you should be doing is spending time doing positive things with positive people. Most of us have that one friend who seems to be able to make us laugh no matter what is going on in our world. Spend time with that person.

It's also a good idea to rediscover yourself, those parts you put on hold when you were with your partner. Those things you like to do but didn't do because your partner didn't want to do them. Now is the time to re acquaint yourself with those activities.

Breakups suck, I'm sorry but there's just no polite way to say it. The nice thing is that if you approach it the right way, you can find constructive ways of dealing with relationship break up that might not only help you move on a little more quickly, but that also might help you out in your next relationship.

Learn To Win Love Back Click Here!

Copyright 2009 All Rights Reserved Revolution Two Church theme by Brian Gardner | Blogger template converted & enhanced by eBlog Templates